The Bonds Market

His arraignment on perjury and obstruction of justice charges stemming from the BALCO investigation is tomorrow, but Barry Bonds says he wants to play baseball next season. For argument's sake, let's assume he avoids jail either via an acquittal or thanks to an exceptionally light sentence. Which teams, if any, would be a good fit?

Well, I think you can all-but-eliminate every single National League team because he just can't play the field any more at an acceptable level. Plus, at this point in his career, he is so much more valuable as a power hitter that it's not worth having to give him a day off so often because of his having played the field the night before. That leaves 14 teams (by the way, why does the NL have two more teams than the AL? Why not move Houston from the NL Central to the AL West? That way, every division in baseball would have 5 teams). Anyway, of those 14 teams, Boston (Ortiz), New York (Giambi), Toronto (Thomas), Chicago (Thome), Cleveland (Hafner), Detroit (Sheffield), Seattle (Vidro), and Oakland (Cust) already have designated hitters who are serviceable or better. That leaves as few as 6 or as many as 8 if you include Seattle and Oakland that would potentially have room for Bonds- Baltimore, Tampa Bay, Kansas City, Minnesota, LA, and Texas.

With the Orioles seemingly trying to get younger rather than older, I just don't see Baltimore being the least bit interested. After all, they already went through Palmeiro-gate once before.

It's probably the same story with Tampa Bay. They have a bunch of young and (in theory) up-and-coming players so I don't see how Bonds would mesh with guys like Upton, Kazmir, Crawford, Longoria, Garza, etc. Let's not forget, the Rays just got rid of Delmon Young who was seen by some as a guy with attitude issues. He's Mr. Congeniality compared to BB.

Kansas City, like Tampa Bay and Baltimore, is a long way from winning or even being competitive in their own division so I don't see Bonds wanting to go there, notwithstanding the fact that the Royals probably wouldn't want him or be able to pay him what he would want, especially considering they just signed Jose Guillen to such an absurd deal.

The Twins are interesting. The odds of Bonds winning a ring there aren't great now that Detroit is so stacked, but he would give them a nice boost in the middle of their order with Morneau, Young, Mauer, Cuddyer and whoever else they get for Santana (I'm still convinced this deal will get done).

LA is also interesting. He could stay out west, give Vlad and Hunter some nice protection and would have the best chance of winning a World Series there than with any other potential suitor.

Texas might be able to pay him and might be willing to take a chance on him (they did the whole Sammy Sosa thing and that actually worked out okay for both sides) but they are not going to finish above Seattle, let alone LA next season, so I doubt Bonds would be too enamored with this team, although given his "situation" (said in a Dane Cook voice), he probably can't be too picky.

Seattle might not be a bad option, although Jose Vidro did have a pretty nice season for the M's last year (.381 OBP, more walks than K's, 600+ plate appearances) and he definitely can't play the field any more so Bonds might not be worth the hit you'd take by losing Vidro in the process.

And in Oakland, Bonds would definitely be a Billy Beane guy...aka a member of the Island of Misfit Toys. But with Dan Haren and Joe Blanton rumored to be on the block and the A's looking to get young again and wait for LA to get old, Bonds just doesn't seem to make as much sense as he did a few months ago.

All that said, I don't think Bonds ever will play again. I have no idea how his trial will play out but will a majority of baseball fans ever actually accept it if he is acquitted? I doubt it. And for that reason, I don't see a big league GM being brave enough to offer him a contract.